Election Day Pain...

Not pain due to the election, I happen to be in pain today and today is an election day.  There is also a weather front that is supposed to move through today - snow and rain mix! I call that SLUSHING. So, even though I hurt, I'm so happy at the thought of getting some SNOW!!! YAY!

Loving the snow crystals.

New Blog Title....

New and improved!! Just Added!!! For Your Enjoyment!!!!

HA. HA.

Fibromyalgia.

Endometriosis.

Celiac.

I wanted to make my blog title:

My Fibromylagia, Endometriosis and NOW including Celiac - Journey...

No whining.

Results were fine.

No cancer. - That's GREAT!

I'm still having yuck bowel movements.

It doesn't matter anymore. If this "all" I have.,

I'll deal with that.

Like I have a

Choice?

Things I'd better not ingest:

Gluten items.

Baked goods - even if made with g-free flours - I'll still have a bad bowel movement.

Tomato with skin - hurts.

But, I can drink my own home-made tomato soup.

This includes my home-made salsa. Any more than 2-3 Tbl. and I'm hurting the next day.

Broccoli & Cauliflower (cooked or raw) - gas

Too much sour cream dips - lactose problems - bad bowel movement and terrible gas.

(I suppose it has nothing to do with the vast quantity of dip I ingested though...)

Certain chocolate syrups

Kikkomen soy sauce.

Pizza :(

BUT! I just eat the toppings! :)

Black beans, type beans.

Too much salt makes my face bloat.

Fried foods

Fried potato chips - hmm... might be a dip connection...

Bananas in any way shape or form will hurt like hell the next day.

No banana breads for me!

I know there are lots of other foods out there, but seeing this makes me sad and tired. I have to think of other ways to find nourishment w/o pain. It seems like alot of work. It feels daunting. I have to rethink eating.  What's left to eat when you live in a northern State where the growing season isn't the best for year-round fresh eating? I can pay...

Whining.

But, just a little.

Waiting on Results

Waiting on the results of my colonoscopy. 

**Warning** Just a bit of swearing going on in the post that follows. If the f-bomb offends you, then read no further. Disclaimer complete.

I guess there was a SMALL polyp and tissues taken - along with biopsy stuff.

I'm still not 'right'. I still have pain in the SAME SPOT!!! I can't wait to ask the doc how far she got and if she found anything near to where I said I was hurting.

I seem to recall her telling me she had nothing specific - that it was probably a gluten issue or hormones.  I remember thinking, "Hormones shouldn't make one spot all the time - day after day!" and I was a bit ticked that I just spent all the time, money, vacation pay and toilet paper - for someone to tell me, "Maybe it's hormonal."

What the fuck is that bullshit?!! I know it isn't hormonal! For crap-ass sake! Who the fuck hurts every day in the same fuckin' spot; day in and day out; sometimes all day?????!!!! ... due to hormones?

Whatever.  I like that doctor. She's nice. However, that's a fuckin' "I-don't-know-what-is-wrong-with-you" answer. So, if the biopsies come back with nothing wrong, once again, it's time to take my health into my own hands! WTF do we have docs for, if they can't even guide us into the right direction and we have to figure it out on our own anyway?

I know. There are times when doctors are AMAZING and we DO need them. I know that they are only human and we do not come with zippers in our abdomen. I just wish it wasn't so FUCKING EXPENSIVE to receive a, "Sorry, I can't help you." bullshit answer.

Bottoms Up!

It's 3:00 p.m. on 10-03-12, and it's time to start my "preparation" for my colonoscopy tomorrow.  I've just taken the 3, 5mg. bisacodyl tablets. I'm to take another 3 at 5 pm and then start drinking the Mirilax every 15 min. after that.  Hmmm...

I already feel like I have to use the facility...

If at any point this becomes too much information, well... too bad. It's my blog and I want to document it every step of the way. I'm hoping to NEVER have to do this again.

Time to go make some chicken broth. Actually, I'm so used to fasting and not eating solids that I'm really not hungry.

****
Okay, so it's now 7:22 p.m. and my girlie friend, Tracy, is here. She's making the b-day cake for tomorrow. I wanted her here to keep track of the cake because I thought I'd be running to pee out of my butt every 5 min. I wasn't far from wrong!! LOL

I'm ALMOST done drinking the 'stuff' and my poop - is really like pee - and it looks just like when I drank it. OMGAWWWWD!!! Tracy says, "You could bottle it and drink it again!" ROFLOL ewwww!!

So, the drink itself isn't awful. I thought it was gonna be awful. However, I mixed the stuff with coconut water and a bit of apple juice - I didn't use gator-aide... I hate gator-aide!

I have to stop here and go pee out my butt some more...

****It is now 8p.m.'ish. I think I've been pretty 'cleaned' out since the last time I wrote.  That wasn't as bad as I thought. The last few swallows of stuff took some mind power to get down.

****

7:45 a.m. - Thursday morning 10-04-12.  I pee'd out my butt one more time. Not much in there. Weight was 172.6#!!! AWESOME!

****
It's now 3:22 p.m. on 10-04-12 -
I'm home from the hospital.  Dr. took out a few things and did some random biopsies. I should know those results in the next few business days.

I  had a panic attack upon arrival at the hospital, but then focused on the paperwork.

They hooked me up to an IV and that was done in 45min.
They then hooked me up to a second IV and about half-way through it was my turn in the surgery room.

Fortunately, a classmate of mine was one of the surgical techs. She was very kind to me in school and was just as kind to me today. I started to cry again and I admitted that I was really scared.  They gave me a little more 'sleepy' meds to help calm me down to to lower my blood pressure. Tricia wiped away my tears, got me a warmer blanket and just kept rubbing my back. She was very caring. It was great.

I slept most thru most of the procedure. I did feel some slight cramping when, I'm assuming, she was removing polyps. She did tell me, "Ok, Tyra, you are going to feel some slight cramping now." I told her it really wasn't too bad and I was fine. I also felt them remove whatever it was that was in my tushy. I remember it feeling like I was pooping and mentally panicked a second! I thought, OMG! I'm pooping! However, I quickly realized that they were removing the scope.

Then they took me back to my room and I promptly fell asleep for over 2 hours.  I remember Matt coming in the room and the nurse peeking in, but then I was out for a good nap.

When my nurse, Darlene, tried to wake me so I could try sitting up and eating, I felt all woozy. I sipped some of my water with ICS in it.  That wasn't enough for her - about an  hour later she made me get up, go potty and drink some more. I even ate the applesauce they gave me, but not the Jell-o, nor the dry cereal. I wasn't sure if the cereal was g-free, although she said she did ask for g-free cereal. I still skipped it.

So, my  head finally cleared enough to be allowed  home.  Now that I'm home, I'm going to go lie down again and watch the movie, "The Goonies" then "You've Got Mail" then "The Holiday".

All-in-all, it wasn't bad. I don't have to do it again until I'm at least 50 years old. That will only be if I'm having any problems. I even got a pic of my insides!

****
10-05-12 - Friday - The Day AFTER

After all the IV fluid they gave me, my weight went back up to 175# - stupid water weight.

I had a bit of diarrhea this morning, but now my poop seems to be normal. Soft, but normal.

The one spot that I was worried about hurt again this morning. I have to ask Doc how far she got and where she was when she removed 'parts'. Nothing else hurts.  The only thing going on with me is that I'm groggy.

It's 6:09 p.m. Felt a bit nauseous today, actually, for most of the day.

I'm not very hungry, but I decided to eat a baked potato anyway.  This morning, I ate the topping off of the pizza we ordered for hubby's birthday treat.

I have not drank enough today. Honestly, I don't think I drank anymore than 1 cup of fluids today!

I'm making chicken stock, turkey stock, extra baked potatoes, a baked chicken with potatoes, carrots, celery, onions and a few beets. I have to work tomorrow, so I have lots of cooking to get done today.  I also want to make some Rice Crispy treats and a white chocolate Chex Mix with peanuts, cinnamon chips, coconut flakes and dried cranberries.

Initial Thoughts From G.I. Doc...

Initial thoughts are that my intestinal pain is NOT a gluten issue, but separate from that. While acknowledging that I definately have issues with gluten, she says my pain stems from something else.

What is the something else? Her initial "hope" is that my pain is coming from endometriosis tissues that have permeated the intestinal wall - that I now have endo tissue INSIDE my intestines. Here's a link:  AKA - Bowel Endometriosis. She said that once she's in there looking around that she will be able to see and remove the endo tissues, as well as anything else that maybe in there.

Further - The endo tissues permeating the intestinal wall has probably caused a (here's a link:) leaky gut syndrome. Or, did the problems with gluten cause a leaky gut??? Who knows. I don't care, I just want to repair it.

Here is another good article:  LINK HERE.

So, next week is my colonoscopy. I hope they find SOMETHING so I can give it a name.

To make intestinal matters worse, I ate some soup today that went sour. I didn't drink lots of it, but several good tablespoonfuls because I couldn't decide if it was bad or not. Then I tried another jar - it was also bad, so dumped all 4 quarts. They didn't seal quite right and went bad on the counter. So, now I have diarrhea on top of my "normal" pain. 

It could be worse. I'm not complaining, I'm just journaling.

Fibro Vlog 1

What I Eat Can Hurt Me...

Saturday we went to a Billy Graham music festival. Lots of great music - Skillet, The Afters, Lacey from Flyleaf and many others were there. We took a cooler for food on the way there and back - to eat in the car.  This is where my post title comes into play...

There are many g-free items that I can eat, some are alright to even eat cold.  But, I didn't have anything substantial to take along.  Sure, there are items like eggs, cold meats, certain corn based snacks, V-8 juice, fruits, veggies, etc., but I didn't want to eat cold eggs and ham all day and I'm allergic to most raw fruits and veggies.  So, I ate before I left and took g-free snacks and then ham sammies for the rest of the car full.  By the end of the day I was good and hungry - the food at the festival wasn't really g-free friendly and the lemon aide was $4.00/ea. 

I ended up eating a regular ham sammy.  Then the rest of our caravan went to McD's.... I was so hungry - I ate part of a Big Mac and some of my hubby's Cola... praying the whole time it wouldn't hurt for the next three days. I just got over a 9-day flare up. I really didn't want to go thru that again.  But, I ate the food I knew would hurt me anyway.  It was about this time when I wished for the days when I could make myself throw-up. Mentally, I felt so awful for putting that gluten back into my system - all I could think of was ways to make myself puke.  I didn't succeed and it all stayed in my stomach.  However, as soon as we got home I took everything I had in the cupboard and fridge to try to combat the pain I was expecting to hit me the next morning.

That worked out, albeit, slightly. I didn't have the pain, but every other problem was there. I'm okay with that. I'm trying so hard to get my intestines to heal and I know it can take months and months to do that, so I was totally kicking myself for eating the sandwich and McD's, but I was HUNGRY!  I can be so dumb...

So, today, I'm going to just take it easy on my intestines and ingest only liquids - chicken stock, colloidal silver, aloe vera juice, coconut water, kefir and water.

Another Doctor Visit

My poor body has just been through the wringer lately. I went back into the doc's office because I thought an infection I had a few weeks ago was either back or not completely gone.

Long story short, it's a brand-new infection!

More meds.

Then another yeast infection from the antibiotics.

So, more meds to counteract that side-effect.

Then, a different pain med, because the antibiotic will do something funky to my body that will make it so my regular pain med WON'T work.

Three scripts in one day! That's a record for me.

Needed My Walker...

I was in the middle of a 5 day flare-up when I could no longer get to a standing position from a sitting position.  When I could get upright, my knees gave out and I tumbled onto the futon. FUCK!

Time to get out my walker. I only needed it, at first, for the one evening, but then I needed it again two days later.  The only thing I don't like about it is that it has wheels and sometimes goes faster than I do! I feel like it will ZOOOOM out in front of me.  Here's a pic I found on the net, but mine is all black:

  

I used to borrow one from my Gramma - I liked that one better. I may have to find one like it, since Gram is no longer with me.  Anyway, I liked that one better because it didn't have wheels - no zooming out from under me.  It was light weight too, so I could have someone take it upstairs and then put on my side of the bed - there to help me get up and out of bed in the morning! That one looked like this: 

The last time I needed a walker was... I think in 2010 and it was around Christmas time. I decorated it with garland and battery operated twinkle lights! It was great fun. Well... as much fun as could be had! LOL

I'm on the way out of this flare-up, but it sure is taking longer this time...

Easing Out Of It

Today, I'm at a Level 2 - this is according to the Fibromyalgia Pain Scale by Carol J. Johnson, which can be found, HERE.

That's alright. I can ignore many things - pain included.  Yesterday was a different story.

Yesterday, I needed my prescribed muscle relaxers, Advil, a natural muscle relaxer, ice, pillows and a gel stick from "The Happy Hempsters" (I think).  It took all day to get about 2.5 hours of relief; at which point it started up again. Fortunately, but that time I was at home and took a heavy dose sleeping pill.

Pain Scale by Carol J. Johnson

Fibromyalgia Pain Scale
When you go to your doctors, one of the first things they will ask you is: "On a scale of 1-10, where is your pain level?" But they fail to give you any degree of pain measurements to go by, so our support group has come up with our version of the Pain Scale.

Level 1: You experience very minor pain in parts of your body. You don't have to take any pain medications and you can do your work with no problems.

Level 2: The minor pain has increased to dull aches in some parts of your body. You don't have to take medication and you still can work as usual but you don't want people 'in your face'!

Level 3: Your minor pain is strong enough to get your attention. You resort to Over the Counter medications. You are getting grouchy now.

Level 4: Now you can only ignore the pain if you are involved in activities at work or home. You are taking more Over the Counter medications but they don't last long. You begin to cut back on your activities in favor of just sitting down.

Level 5: You can't ignore this pain for more than an hour, even with Over the Counter Medications. You cut back of all activities except the most important ones. Work is possible, just barely.

Level 6: You simply can not. Ignore your pain for even a few minutes. But with prescription pain medications you have limited functioning abilities.

Level 7: This level of pain is the kind that keeps you awake at night, makes it hard to think and act. Your prescription medication only dulls the pain for a short time,. You limit your activities in order of importance. You really can't work well.

Level 8: This is serious pain. You don't want to do anything or be bothered by anyone. You have taken so much pain medication you are unable to fully concentrate on anything, Work is out of the question.

Level 9: Very serious pain here. You can not concentrate on anything but pain. You should not do business transactions or make any important decisions because of your limited mental state. You might want to give some one Power of Attorney. You can not go to work and you shouldn't drive a car. At this point you begin withdrawing from the world around you.

Level 10: Pain has made you totally unable to function. You don't want to deal with or talk to anyone. Even with narcotic pain medications you are still in horrible pain. You go to bed or go to the emergency room for any help you can get.

This is how we have divided the pain scale into a workable reference guide for our group and our medical staff. We hope you can use this as a guide when you visit your doctor and have to describe your pain. Our optimal goal of course, is to stay with in the range of 1-4 or even to get to PAIN LEVEL 0, which is NO PAIN!

By Carol J.Johnson
Link to Carol J. Johnson's article.

Pain Scale for Fibromyalgia

The ORIGINAL article can be found here. 
Disclaimer: This isn't written by me! It was written my a lady named Paula, so SHE was the one that designed this pain scale. It's really rather helpful!

Pain Scale for Fibromyalgia

I designed this pain scale as a tool to help the Fibromyalgia patient clearly communicate to his/her doctor the pain levels that he/she is experiencing.

I hope this helps you because at some point in treating my Fibromyalgia, a doctor asked me to put a number value on my pain levels. One thing that we do know is that pain is subjective. What I think of as an 8 and what you think of as an 8 may or may not be the same.
I was really having a hard time assigning a number to my pain levels, so I made this pain scale. I took it to my doctor who received it well. From that point on, she seems to really understand my pain levels now and we have had much better success treating them.
Frequently, I see people whose doctors don't seem to be taking their pain levels seriously. I hope that this pain scale can help everyone get the relief they need by helping the doctors "see" what we are feeling.
(Written by Paula on the ‘Clouds’ message board.)
Please note: This is the pain level that is experienced AFTER taking the daily medication prescribed by your doctor. 0 Pain free. 1 Very minor annoyance - mild aches to some parts of the body. No pain medication needed. 2 Minor annoyance- dull aches to some parts of the body. No pain medication needed. 3 Annoying enough to be distracting. Over-the-counter pain relievers (such as Naproxen or topical treatments such as Arthritis Pain relieving rubs) take care of it. 4 Can be ignored if you are really involved in your work, but still distracting. Over-the-counter pain relievers remove pain for 3-4 hours. 5 Can’t be ignored for more than 30 minutes. Over-the-counter pain relievers help somewhat (bring pain level from 5 to a 3 or 4) with pain for 3-4 hours. 6 Can’t be ignored for any length of time but you can still go to work and participate in social activities. Stronger painkillers (such as Ultram) relieve pain for 3-4 hours. 7 Makes it difficult to concentrate, interferes with sleep. You can still function with effort. Stronger painkillers (such as Ultram) are only partially effective. (Stronger pain killers bring pain from a 7 to a 4-6 level.) 8 Physical activity severely limited. You can read and converse with effort. Stronger painkillers (such as Ultram) are not effective. (Narcotic painkillers do bring this pain down to a level 3 or lower level.) 9 Non functional for all practical purposes. Cannot concentrate. Physical activity halted. Panic sets in. (Narcotic painkillers bring the pain level down from 9 to the 4-6 level.) 10 Totally non-functional. Unable to speak. Crying out or moaning uncontrollably - near delirium.

On a Scale of 1-10

Where am I today on the pain scale?

At a fuckin' 12 -

Seriously, they need an adult version for the stupid little pain scale model. You know that one with the smiley faces turning into angry faces? I'm not angry, I'm in PAIN! There needs to be a face with tears running down the face, mouth wide open like it's screaming or one with a conversation bubble over it dropping the F-bomb.

0:  Hi.  I am not experiencing any pain at all.  I don't know why I'm even here.

1:  I am completely unsure whether I am experiencing pain or itching or maybe I just have a bad taste in my mouth.

2:  I probably just need a Band Aid.

3:  This is distressing.  I don't want this to be happening to me at all.

4:  My pain is not fucking around.

5:  Why is this happening to me??

6:  Ow.  Okay, my pain is super legit now.

7:  I see Jesus coming for me and I'm scared.   

8:  I am experiencing a disturbing amount of pain.  I might actually be dying.  Please help.

9:  I am almost definitely dying.

10:  I am actively being mauled by a bear.

11: Blood is going to explode out of my face at any moment.

That would help alleviate some pain right there! It would give us something to laugh about!

7 Days Into August...

It's only seven days into August and I'm on a 4-day flare up. Not really too bad, but enough to slow me down.  On day 1 I was so medicated, on an empty stomach, that I would sway.  On day 2, I couldn't get up from the couch without my walker.  On day 3 parts hurt everywhere. Today, day 4, I hurt everywhere that didn't hurt yesterday! LOL

It's my own fault - too much sugary drinks lately. Tonight I said, "Fuck it!" and actually ate two smallish pieces of crust from my pizza. The other pieces I skipped the crust.  I was going to fast this week - guess I'll start tomorrow! LOL

Time to medicate and go find the recliner.

July Woes 2012

My July 2012 was filled with health issues...

Sore spot on old c-section scar.

Tenderness all over

Bloating

Fatigue

Vertigo

Abnormal PAP results

Praying

Ultrasound

Transvaginal scope

Lumps, bumps, bruising and more

Masses vs. cysts

Cancer scare

Sleepless nights

Medications

Pain days

Drama

A few pounds heavy

Tenderness at the waistband

Fibromyalgia hot spots

Gluten issues

~

~

~

July ended with a praise report...

No cancer

Still the tender body issues

Now the medical bills issues

Always the praise.

For it wasn't this ~ It would be something else.

I'll take this.

Thank you, Lord.

Three-day Flare Up

How long does a flare up last? Mine last about three days it seems.  My last one was three days and a little more, but I was able to function and go to work so at the end of it.

The weather has been wonderful the past few days. After a flare up I feel like Wonder Woman! I have to be careful to not overdo - lest I go right back into waves of pain! It's been alright though. I got all caught up on laundry, dishes, dusting up golden retriever fuzz and cooking! I miss cooking the most.

So, since I have the morning yet, I'm off to jump rope and then bake some gluten-free brownies!

Black Bean Gluten-Free Brownie Recipe

When I Hurt

I don't know if I've used that as a title once before or not, but when I hurt I hurt alot and I just want to say, "Fuck it all."

Now, I know that isn't the most intelligent or creative thing I could say, but when I'm in pain, I really don't give a flying fuck what anyone thinks. I'm hurting. I'm cranky when I hurt. I may not always be cranky openly - sometimes I'm cranky on the inside. Like tonight when I had to work. I was cranky on the inside. The thoughts inside my head were mean. I didn't speak any of those thoughts, because they were irrational and not "ME".  However, when I'm hurting I do tend to drop the f-bomb a bit more.  Sometimes people will notice and they will say things like, "I didn't know you swore!"  Well, of COURSE I swear. It's just that USUALLY, I'm bigger than that little bomb of mine. USUALLY, I'm more creative. USUALLY, I'm more patient and can endure more.

But, not today. Today I hurt and I don't give a flying fuck what anyone thinks of me. I will be understanding with you - please be understanding towards me. Actually, today - pain day #3 - I don't care if you understand or not! LOL  USUALLY, I will ask for your patience and understanding, but not today.

I've been hurting for three days now.  I was medicated for the first two. Tonight, I'm not medicated because I had to drive. However, I will be going to bed soon and you can bet you sweet pjammas that I will have a medicated slumber tonight.

Overwhelmed

I'm feeling a bit overwhelmed with what I WANT to do vs. what I am able to do.

For instance:

There are days when I want to get the housework done and I can't.
There are days when I want to be in the garden and I can't.
There are days when I want to be at the computer and I can't.

I need to focus on what I can do...

I can give words of encouragement.
I can show my family that I love them.
I can direct my household from the couch.
I can talk on the phone while resting.
I can share a movie with my kids while on the couch resting.
I can read lots of books on those days when I need extra rest.
I can always pray, resting or not.
I can rest and enjoy the breezes that gently blow through my living room windows.
I can enjoy my time homeschooling my guys.
I can sit and enjoy the ride, while someone else drives us to the beach.

I have more CAN-do's than CAN'T-do's.

Brain Fog & Forgetting Things

I'm struggling with coherency. I can't seem to get a thought moving, much less have a complete one, once I figure out what I'm trying to say.  This brain fog is really something today. Yesterday was... actually, the whole past... 10 days or so has been terrible.  As a family, we are going through several emotional events. I think I just have so much on my plate that my fibro brain is on overload. Hell, even if I didn't have fibro, I'd be on a mental overload.

I like Valerian for my muscle pains and as a sleep aid -- and as an anti-anxiety.  I also have some Valium, but the Valerian actually works better for me! I forgot to get my prescription for a new anxiety med - twice. Tomorrow I can't get it because I'll be gone all day, so  hopefully, Friday I can get it.  I'll use the Valerian for now.

Today, my pain is manageable. It's the shoulders and arms today.

Fibro Fog & Tetanus Shot

My pain causes me to to have a foggy brain.  Even typing this is slow going because I am struggling with processing coherent thoughts as well as being concerned with spelling and typos.

I had a tetanus shot today. The nurse was funny. She said, "Oh, you have fibro don't you? I'm sorry." and POKE she went.  I  had to laugh. I laugh even harder when I retell it to my friends, because then I get to exaggerate how aggressive her poke was - when it really was just a normal poke. She said it was really, really, really, really (1, 2, 3, 4... yup 4x's) gonna hurt. It DID TOO!!  I hope it isn't like this tomorrow!

The pain is back and legs today -- and the shoulder that got poked!

A Day Centered On Pain

I am in alot of fucking pain!

Today

Endo pain

&

Fibro pain

Work in the morning --- all day long

Four pills instead of two

Two more pills instead of one

Endo in front

Fibro

in back, legs, neck and upper arms.

Arms Today

Today, it's the arms that don't like being attached to my main frame. Too bad for them. They have to stay put. I can't take them off!! I don't know why they ache today - I guess fibro doesn't need a reason.

The meds that my doctor gave me the other day -- they are way too strong for me. In fact, I think after a few days, they caused a jittery nervousness in my system.  I couldn't fall asleep like I normally did before I started the meds.  Then, after finally falling asleep, I didn't wake up until 9:30 a.m. yesterday and almost 10 a.m. today.  Normally, I'm awake by 6:30-7a.m. and I'm bouncing outta bed.  On these meds, I noticed that I'm half asleep, groggy, foggy in the brain and not functioning properly until Noon or later.  This just won't do.  So, I'm stopping this med.  I think I'll just ask for a 5 mg. Valium or something. This 30 mg. pill is way too strong.

Doctoring

I had a doctor appointment this morning. I had lots of questions about fibromyalgia and sleeping.  He confirmed all of my concerns and told me not to worry.  Apparently, I have every trigger point and a high pain tolerance.  He gently scolded me for waiting to come in. I gently reminded him that I want to be as natural as possible.  I also said that I didn't want anything in my medical records yet for several reasons. One being that herbal remedies seem to help with muscle pain. Another reason being insurance.

When he mentioned pain tolerance levels and different meds to take. I said that none of the things I mentioned consistently keep me from working - that I can work thru/with the pain whether or not I take an herbal muscle relaxant(s) or not.  They certainly help at alleviating the pain though.  At this point he changed his mind on what to prescribe.

I have a problem staying asleep. Falling asleep is easy, staying there is another ballgame. He was going to give me an antidepressant - I'm not depressed. It's a mild antidepressant, but great for sleeping.  Then he changed his mind.  Let's try something else. The big question then was, when do I take it? Do I take it at 2 a.m. when I wake up? I don't need help falling asleep, just staying asleep. He suggested I try it AT bedtime for a week, to see if I stay asleep.

Then I asked if it will make me bloated or fat - no real answer. I should have asked if it would strain my kidneys.... I forgot that.

So, questions answered and maybe there will be a full 8 hours of sleep around the corner.  Wish me pleasant dreams.

Weather Front?

This card isn't my design, I saw it on
etsy - I think by a J. Cuthbertson.

The weather was pretty steady this past weekend. While Friday was fraught with waves, Saturday and Sunday were wonderful pain free days.

Today is another story. The forecast for tomorrow is 80% chance of a snow 'storm'. I wonder if this is the reason for the change in my pain.  I had a good night's rest both Sat. & Sun., but today I awoke with an achy right side of the whole length of my body. Honestly, head-to-toe I'm aching and I have no explanation as to why.

I'm told that's the deal with fibro - that there is no rhyme or reason to one's pain.  Is that what is going on with me?

Pain in Waves

My blogs are like oceans. I've said that before.  However, now I'm relating my body to an ocean also.  Some days I'm calm and serene. Other days the waves are loud and crashing; all consuming and hypnotizing; powerful surges from head-to-toe.  Like an upsurge or rise, pain comes to a crest.  Progressively swelling not only in size, but also intensity.  I am reminded by that sea shell to tread lightly through my pain... through my life.  Nothing matters unless it has to do with eternity. I tread lightly through my pain days. Eventually, calm will come again. The sun will come out as the fog clears.

When I'm in the throes of a flare up, it feels like it will never end. I know it will, but it's kinda overwhelming and sometimes I get scared while I'm in the middle of it all.

Not only do I feel waves of pain going from the top of my head to the bottom of my feet, but I also feel a nagging headache trying to get my attention.  I feel that I may be slipping into a weekend that will end up on the couch. Waves of pain are slowly growing in their intensity. I'm glad we got some movies!  One of them was the second half of the latest Dr. Who season! Yay!  The laundry is pretty much done, the house is pretty much clean, the dishes are done and this weekend we will use paper plates if I'm not up for anything.  I wonder if wine coolers will put me to sleep or aggravate my pain???  hmmm... Groceries are purchased and put away, so lunches won't be a problem. 

I guess I can just sit back and try to relax!  I wish I had a list of uplifting scriptures to go to when I'm in this mindset. I have a friend that can help with that - I'll send off an email to her straight away!  Then I should be all set when my hubby gets home!