I Feel Weird Today

I feel weird today.  I think the amount of blood I lost, while not by the gallon, is more than I would normally lose. It isn't time for my cycle, so any blood lost now is in excess of what I would normally lose.  Anyway, I feel so tired and kinda weak.

I read that my procedure can become infected. I hope to fuck not!

So, today, I'm tired, dizzy, feel weird and weak. I have slight pinchy feelings in my hoochie. Sometimes the pinchy feeling lasts about 2 min. and hurts like all fuck!  At other times, I feel like I'm ovulating. When I ovulate, I usually hurt. It's that kind of hurt. I also hurt after having an orgazm - which I haven't recently, but I'm just adding that here. Afterwards, I hurt all over. My abdomen, my ovaries, my chest hurts, my hips will hurt and sometimes my arms hurt.  It's not like we have super sonic sex, not at all. It just hurts my body. I'd rather skip it all together.

Anyway, I feel weird today.

Colposcopy

I had to have one yesterday. The part of the pap that is off, indicates cervical cancer.

My uncomfortable spot to spread wide.

The procedure didn't hurt. I didn't feel him clip away a piece of my cervix. I felt his hand move, but no pain. The pain came later, just a bit of sharp stabby. 

Still bleeding tho. That can take up to 5 days to stop. I happen to bleed very easy tho... 

I know I don't have a real reason to whine, but I would like too. I'm tired of not being in perfect health. I'm tired of headaches and hurting so bad that I can't move.

Honestly, I think of death often. But,then I think of grand babies. That only helps for a little. 

I don't want to deal with cancer. 

What the HELL Is Wrong With Me?

I'm telling ya.... it's just a bit too crazy.

First, it's ENDOMETRIOSIS - which I have.

Then, it's FIBROMYALGIA - which I wonder about.

Then, it's CELIACS - which the doctor saw damage, so, okay... I have it then.

Now, they tell me I have MS - beginning stages.

W. T. F.

Honestly, this is what I believe:

I have endometriosis and all sorts of "fun" damage that goes with that.

I also have intestinal damage from gluten.

I think the fibro symptoms MIMIC the symptoms that I can get from gluten damage. No to fibro.

I think the MS symptoms MIMIC the fibro which MIMICS the gluten damage symptons. Not sure about the MS.

However, I do have some brain lesions .... these can come from ENDO damage AND stages of MS.

So, what I know is that my head hurts every day. My body hurts every day. My intestines only hurt if I ingest gluten. I fall LESS when I stay away from gluten.  My legs don't lose function when I stay away from gluten --- so far. But, my head.... that hurts every day. My body.... every day.

But, it's all manageable! So, I'm good!

My Little Pain Buddy